Distant drums sound so romantic…..

It’s so complicated to find out the mechanism of the psychology of human’s mind. A fact that may sound logical, compatible and most suitable to one person,  may sound adverse, pain orienting to another person. The same situation often occurs in relationship between husband and wife. As a couple, both are supposed to live  in a nexus saturated with love, benevolence and cordiality.  But despite of taking all precautions, circumstances turn up into a preposterous mode.

                                       Complexity of relationship 

  For instance, some family related decisions taken by a husband may seem illogical and contradictory to a wife. On the other hand, if the same decision is taken by a neighboring head of a family, under the same circumstances, she approves them as sound and sane decision. Why it happens ? Simple! A proverb applies here, “A prophet is seldom honored in his own land.”

So, this article is related to the psychology of opposing the decisions, taken by a patriarch of family in the capacity of a husband (or father). Why a woman has got a conception (often false one,) that if neighbor was asked for an advice, he could have delivered a better judgement ? Amazingly, the same conception, the wife of neighbor carries about her husband, in the same circumstances. This entire process is affected by a complex mechanism. In this complex mechanism, both the parties( husband and wife) are not opting to take one another at par.

Here, man as the head of the family is inclined to underestimate the woman of the family as, “not so matured one.” This deportment symbolizes, the concept of “man dominating society. This further is back up by a conception of ” ruling over other or imposing one’s decision over others by human being.”   When the term “human being” is used, it is inclusive of both man and woman. Here, this desire to rule over others, exists both in man and woman (husband as well as wife.) Man intends to rule over his woman and woman intends the same. The reason being, she presupposes herself as an entity, who is running domestic affairs cleverly.

                Difference of domain between man and woman

 Here, man’s domain to rule over other may generally is far wider.  In the sense that he has got the facility to rule over others,  in his out door activities. This may be in shape of, as a head of some business entrepreneurship or in some office as a head of the office etc.  In contrast to that, a woman in the capacity of a house wife, always lives with the “sole desire” to command her husband. Her husband is her only ” surgical cum operational domain.”

Amazing fact is, the man with whom she enters into a nuptial tie after a long dating. Who at the time of dating with her, seemed to her  a well versed, matured one. A propitious man, laden with  all virtues and good earning hand, now she carps his every action. And she does all this, with the sole desire to take him under her “grab.” And, in this process of taking him under her command/ to dominate over him, she needs to prove him as a “weaker and full of fallacies. The situation is bogged here.

                                       Man’s obstinate conception 

  Man on the other hand, combats on several fronts.  When, out of the house, he lives with a feeling, ” she is my better half and should abide by my commands.” He does not have any other option in this regard. Since, his mind and soul is engaged on various fronts, to establish his dominance there. Just opposite to man, a woman has got a singular front to insist upon and the target is the “poor” creature named husband. A woman gives her life long efforts in the microscopical study to detect his weak points. Microscopical study, I think is the appropriate term. Since, her eyes ably catches the presence of a small piece of  dark hair, on the black hued coat of her husband. She even succeeds in carping the vices of husband.

The reason behind is, man by nature is prone to many vices to find entertainment. He may have addiction to smoking, alcohol, cards playing and so many other things. It’s the matrix of the man. Along with, a man who in his day long business behaves like a commander in the house hold affairs; the same man, in the “seclusion of bed room” at night to pacify his lust “cajoles and entreats” before his woman like a sycophant. And, if he does not succeed in this way, he becomes cruel. Then by dint of force he satisfies his biological lust, that behavior is at par forcing screw. All this, eventually come up as weak point of man, and no doubt, it’s the defeat of man in her eyes.

Here only, the psychological concept of a woman, about the “fair decision taking capacity” of neighboring gentleman, gets captured by a false or imaginary ideology. She begins to assume, neighboring gentleman free from all fallacies. It seems to her, he does not have man’s” intrinsic” weaknesses. Meanwhile, the next door man too is confronted with the same situation in the eyes of his wife. But women are women, once they conceive a thought, you can’t stir them an atom. Every woman considers that peace and felicity stays next door to her. The neighbor, she assumes as “hen pecked” husband, and this feeling create an inferiority inside her.

Less or more, it’s a situational delusion, with every woman and interesting facade of this is, no woman intends to come out of this delusion. Penned by– Vinay Pharasi…..